I hate people who drive white cars
"Why?" I hear you ask. Well....
Thanks to some prick in a white car I now have some unwanted ‘White Go Faster Stripes’ on the front nearside wing of my beloved car. Wankers. I don't care that they didn't stop to bother leaving their details after all I could have got them to buy me a new wing which would cost ££££ and they might not have ££££. I wish though that they would leave a little note along the lines of:
"I AM VERY SORRY I HAVE DAMAGED YOUR CAR. THIS WAS BECAUSE I AM A SHIT DRIVER, I CAN'T PARK WITHOUT DAMAGING OTHER PEOPLE'S PROPERTY AND I AM RECKLESS BECAUSE I THINK I HAVE CONTROL AND JUDGEMENT OF MY CAR. I WILL NOW GO AND DRIVE OFF A BRIDGE TO AID THE EVOLUTION OF THE HUMAN RACE."
If only......
Thanks to some prick in a white car I now have some unwanted ‘White Go Faster Stripes’ on the front nearside wing of my beloved car. Wankers. I don't care that they didn't stop to bother leaving their details after all I could have got them to buy me a new wing which would cost ££££ and they might not have ££££. I wish though that they would leave a little note along the lines of:
"I AM VERY SORRY I HAVE DAMAGED YOUR CAR. THIS WAS BECAUSE I AM A SHIT DRIVER, I CAN'T PARK WITHOUT DAMAGING OTHER PEOPLE'S PROPERTY AND I AM RECKLESS BECAUSE I THINK I HAVE CONTROL AND JUDGEMENT OF MY CAR. I WILL NOW GO AND DRIVE OFF A BRIDGE TO AID THE EVOLUTION OF THE HUMAN RACE."
If only......
posted by Nurton at 8:42 am
1 Comments:
How about converting to a little idea of mine. I formulated this when people kept pulling out or executing random emergency stops in front of the Alfa.
The idea is, you start with an American car. But not something iconic like a Charger, Corvette or Mustang. Oh no; the idea is to pick one of those bland and anonymous early '80s "station wagons" that make a Volvo look like a Dinky toy.
You then convert it to LPG, alcohol or the cheap alternative fuel of your choice.
Then, when someone attempts to crash into you, there's no need for avoidance or anything silly like that. You just sink back into your seat and let 3900lb of prime iron sweep those minor inconveniences from your path.
Similarly for parking accidents; why care, when you always know they came off worse?
Post a Comment
<< Home