Conspiracy Theories
Today was a wonderful day (so far...). Caroline drove Colin, Kat, Elkie and me out to the home of the English Riviera; Dawlish Warren. It is about a 30 minute drive outside Exeter down the coast and will be a horrifically horrible place once the holiday season gets underway with the sea front hosting the mandatory crappy arcades etc. The school holiday season hasn't started yet so we only had to share the huge beach with other student and those lucky people sponsored by the DSS. I didn't take any photos but here is a photo I found on the interweb that shows what it is like:

I managed to burn the tops of my feet quite badly as I didn't paste them up properly with sun cream. Normally I always wear shoes so they are whiter than an albino cat, now they look more like the eyes of an albino cat. Rather red! We walked along the beach and scrabbled up the sea wall, brought an ice cream (Strawberry Cornetto for Nurton) watched a RAF Jaguar fly over our heads at low altitude, a virgin train speed past and walked back to the Colin who we had left to "guard" our bags. How very pleasant. Oh and the weather was blooming wonderful!!!! Very hot.
Earlier in the day Kat rather disturbingly referred to me not as Noel or even Nurton (nobody calls me this in the real world!) but as "Fatface". Of course I told her never to call me that again. She did not heed to my warning as she referred to me again by this derogatory name later in the afternoon.
Now, I'm sure you’re wanting to know why I give a shit about this? Well the thing is that when I was little my brother was 12 years older than me (he still is) and therefore considerably bigger and stronger than me. "Fatface" was what he would call me and he knew I hated it. Amazingly soon after I turned 16 and became a taller stronger person than him he stopped using this name! Now I am shocked to discover that he has discovered a means to wind me up by proxy. I have yet to discover how the little weasel communicates with Kat to pass on this sensitive information about my childhood. But if I ever find out that this is more than just paranoid conspiracy theory, there will be trouble!

I managed to burn the tops of my feet quite badly as I didn't paste them up properly with sun cream. Normally I always wear shoes so they are whiter than an albino cat, now they look more like the eyes of an albino cat. Rather red! We walked along the beach and scrabbled up the sea wall, brought an ice cream (Strawberry Cornetto for Nurton) watched a RAF Jaguar fly over our heads at low altitude, a virgin train speed past and walked back to the Colin who we had left to "guard" our bags. How very pleasant. Oh and the weather was blooming wonderful!!!! Very hot.
Earlier in the day Kat rather disturbingly referred to me not as Noel or even Nurton (nobody calls me this in the real world!) but as "Fatface". Of course I told her never to call me that again. She did not heed to my warning as she referred to me again by this derogatory name later in the afternoon.
Now, I'm sure you’re wanting to know why I give a shit about this? Well the thing is that when I was little my brother was 12 years older than me (he still is) and therefore considerably bigger and stronger than me. "Fatface" was what he would call me and he knew I hated it. Amazingly soon after I turned 16 and became a taller stronger person than him he stopped using this name! Now I am shocked to discover that he has discovered a means to wind me up by proxy. I have yet to discover how the little weasel communicates with Kat to pass on this sensitive information about my childhood. But if I ever find out that this is more than just paranoid conspiracy theory, there will be trouble!

2 Comments:
Great minds think alike!
What has "Great minds" got to do with either of you!!!!????
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